Born again

Every cell in the human body regenerates on average every seven years. Like snakes, in our own way we shed our skin. Biologically we are brand new people. We may look the same, we probably do, the change isn't visible at least in most of us, but we are all changed completely forever.

 When we say things like "people don't change" it drives scientists crazy because change is literally the only constant in all of science. Energy. Matter. It's always changing, morphing, merging, growing, dying. It's the way people try not to change that's unnatural. The way we cling to what things were instead of letting them be what they are. The way we cling to old memories instead of forming new ones. The way we insist on believing despite every scientific indication that anything in this lifetime is permanent. Change is constant. How we experience change that's up to us. It can feel like death or it can feel like a second chance at life. If we open our fingers, loosen our grips, go with it, it can feel like pure adrenaline. Like at any moment we can have another chance at life. Like at any moment, we can be born all over again.

you are right

You can seek the advice of others, surround yourself with trusted advisors. But in the end, the decision is always yours and yours alone. And when it's time to act and you're all alone with your back against the wall, the only voice that matters is the one in your head. The one telling you what you already knew. The one that's almost always right.

dont tell anybody

I was swimming. I was fighting. Then I thought, just for a second, I thought ‘What’s the point?’ And then I let go. I stopped fighting. Don’t tell anybody

i had a terrible day

I had a terrible day, we say it all the time. A fight with the boss, the stomach flu, traffic. That's what we describe as terrible, when nothing terrible is happening.

These are the things we beg for, a root canal, an IRS audit, coffee spilled on our clothes. When the really terrible things happen, we start begging to god to bring back the little horrors and take away this.It seems quaint now, doesn't it. The flood in the kitchen, the poison oak, the fight that leaves you shaking with rage. Would it have helped, if we could see what else was coming. Would we have known that those were the best moments of our lives.

repeat-do you remember your first LOVE?

Maybe your first love is the one that sticks with you because it's the only person who will ever receive all of you. After that, you learn better. But, most of all, no matter what, a piece of you forever remains left behind in the heart of the one you loved, a piece no future lover could ever get, no matter what. That piece holds innocence, the believe that love really can last forever. It holds friendship and pain, trial and error, that one kiss you'll never forget, and that night under the stars you can never get back. It holds youth and everything you thought love would be, everything that was proven wrong.

sometimes i'm terrified

sometimes im terrified of my heart, of its constant hunger for whatever it is it wants. The way it stops and starts.

repeat- can anyone be friends after ...

"can we still be friends?" Can anyone ever truly be friends again after a break up? You give a person your everything. In turn, they learn everything about you, every insignificant fact. But suddenly they disappear. They aren't yours anymore and you are somehow supposed to talk to them. There will be awkward pauses where the "i love you" used to go and the colorful conversations will become dull and pianful. And even if years pass, you still won't talk normally because talking ot them at all will remind you why you fell in love with them in the first place.